


An American's Handbook for Brit-picking

by Shoes of Acacia (orphan_account)



Series: Bad Advice from an Angsty Teen [1]
Category: British Television/Films, Doctor Who & Related Fandoms, Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: British English, Gen, Guides, Spelling & Grammar, brit-picking, no story
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-10
Updated: 2017-01-14
Packaged: 2018-09-16 15:32:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 2,443
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9278171
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/Shoes%20of%20Acacia
Summary: There are more differences between American and British English than spelling "color" with a 'u'. With this guide to Brit-picking, you'll be speaking like an American trying to speak like an English person in no time.





	1. Introduction

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [The Cranky Bint's Guide To Brit-Picking](https://archiveofourown.org/works/2399513) by [hobbitsdoitbetter](https://archiveofourown.org/users/hobbitsdoitbetter/pseuds/hobbitsdoitbetter). 



> The other parts of the U.K. - Scotland, Wales, and part of Ireland - may and probably do have a slightly different way of speaking. While the basics of British English apply to the rest of the U.K., I'm only speaking from the experience I have, which excludes those places. Actually, his is more of a guide to "English" English, but that doesn't sound quite as good.
> 
> I know someone has already done it, but it's a guide to specific words, like "flat" instead of "apartment". If you'd like to read it, it's "A Cranky Bint's Guide to Brit-picking" by hobbitsdoitbetter. I'm requesting it as a related work.
> 
> Also, and most importantly, this should not be taken as a 'professional' or end-all-be-all guide to Brit-picking. I'm using sources to double-check things (which I've cited at the end), but, seeing as I'm writing this by myself, I'm probably going to make mistakes.

Before we start, I need to get two things out of the way. It's only fair that I tell you, seeing as these two things are like, pretty _good_ reasons for you to change your mind.

First off, you could just binge-watch  _Skins_ or  _The Inbetweeners_ and pick up on enough to British-ify your writing. Hell, I'm listening to the latter as I'm writing this. There's heaps of slang in British comedies, especially ones about stupid, constantly horny teenagers. 

Second of all, and more importantly,  **I'M AN AMERICAN, _a Taylor Swift-loving, Kool-Aid-drinking, Twizzlers-eating Kentuckian_. ** If you haven't NOPE'd out of here already, I'd assume you're still a bit hesitant, and I wouldn't blame you. I mean, it's like if you went into a class on sign language, but the teacher didn't have any arms.  _No thanks._ That being said, I do have experience with British English in that

I'm bilingual-I speak English and German-and I've been watching British films/shows since I was little. 

 _"So, what you're saying is that your writing about British **English** is justified because you speak _ ** _German_** _and you've seen Doctor Who?"_ you might be asking.

Yes. Those things wouldn't be nearly as good of justifications, though, on their own. It's because of both of those factors, and how they've intertwined together.

When you study a different language, you start seeing variants of your native language as languages of their own. British English is so similar to American English, though, that we're already _mostly_ fluent in it. When you listen to British English often, your brain starts to fill in those gaps - starts to pick up on how things are phrased differently until, eventually, you can switch back and forth between two versions of a language without really thinking about it. From all of what you hear and what you  _don't_ hear, you can start to sort of just  _know_ what does or doesn't sound natural.

I've been studying German for a few years, and, sometime during the second year, I started looking into the evolution and connections between language in my free time. So, on top of what I've picked up on from listening, I also know things about how and in what ways AE and BE have branched out from the single language they started as. I have an ear and an eye for British English. 

Furthermore, I think my experience with American English makes me more qualified, to an extent. Of course, I wouldn't be more reliable than, say, someone who's spent considerable time in the UK and the States, but I'd think I  _would_ be more reliable than a British person who doesn't know anything about AE. It would be nearly impossible to teach French to Swedish people if you only speak French, and, likewise, it would be hard to help Americans fully understand BE if you have no idea how Americans phrase things. Think of me not as a French teacher with the French accent, but a French teacher with a Swedish accent. 


	2. Part 1: Where Are All the 'U's? - Basic Spelling

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alternate spelling is one of the simplest, but most important things to remember when brit-picking.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you don't feel like memorising these, you can always type on a phone using a UK English keyboard. It'll autocorrect any American spelling to British spelling, as it doesn't register as a word.

When it comes to British spelling, there are three major patterns that show up  _everywhere._ Like all rules though, they have exceptions - stupid, hard-to-follow exceptions. 

 

**1.) Some -er endings become -re.**

Examples:

theater ->  **theatre**

meter ->  **metre**

center ->  **centre**

liter ->  **litre**

 

Exceptions:

-people/professions (e.g. caterer, gardener)

-most abstract nouns - things you can't touch or feel, excluding units of measurement (e.g. laughter, banter)

 

**2.) O(r) becomes ou(r).**

Examples: 

neighbor ->  **neighbour**

color ->  **colour**

flavor ->  **flavour**

 

Exceptions:

-Again, people/professions (e.g. doctor, actor)

 

This rule also applies to variants of 'our' words, like "humourous".

 

**3.) -iz(e) endings become -is(e)**

Examples:

realize->  **realize**

fantasize ->  **fantasise**

capitalize ->  **capitalise**

 

Exceptions:

-one-syllable words (e.g. size)

 

This rule also applies to variants of 'ise' words, like "rationalisation".

  

 

 

 

 

 


	3. Part 2: Er, Mum, I've Fallen On My Bum - "Special" Spelling

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I probably could've put both spelling chapters together, since this one is so short, but I'd rather separate them. Feels neater.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If I leave anything out of any of these sections, please let me know. Thanks!

Some words are spelled differently for no real reason. It's just the way AE and BE evolved over time.

 

**"Uh" and "um" become "er" and "erm" respectively.**

They're said the same, though. I think it may have something to do with how British people pronounce '-er' with less articulation that Americans do.

 

**"Mom" becomes "mum" (also applies to "mommy")**

This one is pretty well-known, but I'm listing it. These two are  _not_ pronounced the same. 

 

**"Ass" becomes "arse"**

Probably another variant related to what I mentioned in the first example.

 

**"Butt" becomes "bum"**

You could argue that this is more of a slang difference than a spelling one, but they're not much further apart than "ass" and "arse" are.

 

**"Practice" becomes "practise"**

I was going to include this in the last chapter, but there's really no consistent rule this follows. A commenter corrected me when I did include it, because I was very, _very_ wrong. (Aghh) 

 

**"Defense" and "offense" become "defence" and "offence"**

 

**"Practice" (when used as a verb) becomes "practise"**

 

 

 


	4. Part 3: Wow, She's Clever AND Fit! - Different Meanings In Words

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> These chapter titles are really stupid, but they're supposed to emphasise a point...and I'm also just not very creative.
> 
> Like, at all.

These words exist in American English, but they almost have completely meanings in British English. In the UK, though, a lot of these words ALSO have the American meaning, but it doesn't go the other way around.

 

**Brilliant:**

What it means in AE -  _extremely smart_

-Used in a sentence -  _"Vincent Van Gogh was, sadly, not seen for his brilliance until after he died."_

 

What it means in BE -  _great_

-Used in a sentence - 

_"David, look! My brother sent me his ear likewhatthefuck?"_

_"What? No way, that's brilliant!"_

 

**Mad**

What it means in AE -  _angry_

-Used in a sentence -  _"Yeah, Sarah is really mad at me."_

 

What it means in BE - _insane, out of one's mind_

-Used in a sentence -  _"Yeah, Sarah's gone mad. She won't stop listening to Phil Collins."_

**Clever**

 

What it means in AE -  _smart in a creative sense_

-Used in a sentence -  _"That was so clever, using her shoelace as a hair tie."_

 

What it means in BE -  _smart in general_

-Used in a sentence -  _"She was the cleverest student in her class."_

 

 

**Mental**

 

What it means in AE -  _relating to the mind_

-Used in a sentence -  _ **"** The doctors are going to have do a mental evaluation on Simon."_

 

What it means in BE -  _crazy_

-Used in a sentence -  _"We should probably make Simon see a doctor, seeing as he's gone absolutely mental."_

 

**Fit**

What it means in AE -  _physically healthy_

-Used in a sentence -  _"My aunt goes to the gym every week to stay fit"_

 

What it means in BE -  _attractive, "hot"_

-Used in a sentence -  _"Wow, that girl over there is fit."_

 

 

 

**Spunk**

What it means in AE -  _confidence, courage_

-Used in a sentence -  _"For someone with six toes, she sure does have a lot of spunk."_

 

What it means in BE -  **...** _ **semen. It means semen.**_

-Used in a sentence -  _No._

 

 

**"Cheers"**

What it means in AE -  _a show of thanks/gratitude towards something, usually - almost always - used while clicking two glasses together/raising a glass in the air (Seriously, I've never seen it - the phrase, not the verb - used in any other context.)_

-Used in a sentence - _"_ _Angela shouted 'Cheers!' as she held her glass up."_

 

What it means in BE -  _1.) "Thanks", 2.) A goodbye that's also a thank you_

-Used in a sentence

(1.) -  _"Cheers, mate. I'll wear this scarf all the time!"_

(2.) -  _"' Cheers,' Andy said to Mrs. Robinson after she drove him home."_

**Shag (uncommon in AE)**

What it means in AE -  _1.) a carpet, 2.) a messy hairstyle_

-Used in a sentence 

(1.) -  _"She had a red shag thrown over her living room floor."_

(2.) -  _"Ew, look at his shag! He needs to cut it."_

 

What it means in BE -  _To have sex (vulgar)_

-Used in a sentence -  _" Yeah, Samantha is fit. I'd shag her."_

 

**Sod (Uncommon in AE)**

What it means in AE -  _the ground, but like, the grass, too._

-Used in a sentence - ?  _I  honestly don't even know how to use this._

 

What it means in BE -  _a person who's a dick._

-Used in a sentence -  _"What a sod, walking in here like he knows everything."_

 

**Biscuit**

What it means in AE -  _a type of bread_

-Used in a sentence -  _"I made sausage biscuits for breakfast."_

 

What it means in BE -  _a cookie_

-Used in a sentence -  _"We all meet for biscuits and tea on Thursdays."_

 

 

**Trainer(s)**

What it means in AE -  _a person who helps with physical fitness, usually_

-Used in a sentence -  _"Did you hear that Maggie got a personal trainer?"_

 

What it means in BE -  _sneaker(s)_

-Used in a sentence -  _"Did you hear Maggie's gotten a new pair of trainers?"_

 

**Jumper (clothing)**

What it means in AE -  _A short dress without sleeves that normally goes over collared shirts._

-Used in a sentence -   _"Eloise wears jumpers in the winter, and I can't stand it."_

 

What it means in BE -  _A sweater/pullover_

-Used in a sentence -  _"She pulled her jumper over her head and walked out the door."_

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sure I left out some. Let me know if I did. :)


	5. Part 4: I've Never Quite Understood Flordians - Words Used More Often

Some phrases/words that are used formally in AE are used in casual conversation in BE

I've noticed that British people are a little more variant with their use of the English language, so whereas an American may not say certain BE things as naturally, AE phrasing is mostly used in BE, too.

Yes, Americans do use these, but hardly ever verbally. They all sound really awkward coming out of our mouths.

A bit

AE: "The bread is kind of/a little overdone."

BE: the above option or "The bread is a bit overdone."

 

Quite

AE: "Well, it's good, but something about it doesn't seem finished."

BE: "Well, it's good, but it doesn't seem quite finished."

 

Rather

AE: "He's pretty quiet, isn't he?"

BE: "He's rather quiet, don't you think?" (I've never heard British people using "pretty" in the sense that Americans do. I asked an online English friend about it, and he said that it's used sometimes, but _rarely,_ and the people who use it are probably under American influence.)

 

Suppose (Thanks to commenter Lysander, for pointing this out <3)

AE: I guess she's just not hungry.

BE: I suppose she just isn't hungry.


	6. Part 5 - She's Finished Primary School - Phrasing and Cultural Differences

Some British phrases, references and gestures won't make any sense at all to Americans, and vice versa.

(I may do a master list/chart of AE-> BE words/slang, but for an organised, detailed guide on slang words, refer to the work this was inspired by. :) )

 

Wording

Phrasing/Grammar:

-Collective nouns in AE are treated as singular (e.g. The class is working), but in BE, they can be treated as either plural or singular in BE (e.g. "The choir is/are singing)

-I'm done/I'm done with/I'm finished (I'm done/done with/finished eating) -> I've finished (e.g. I've finished writing)

 

Vocabulary:

I've got a crush (on someone) -> I fancy (someone)

-'Fancy' can also be used in a sense like "Would you fancy a drink?"

I called (someone) -> I rang (someone)

I'm going to the movies -> I'm going to the cinema

I saw a movie/film -> I saw a film

 

Cultural Differences

(I was going to include measurements in here, but the measuring systems in both the US and the UK are so confusing that it'd be easier just to look them up.)

 

Driving (pretty obvious stuff):

-While Americans drive on the right side of the road, British people drive on the left side of the road

-In cars, the passenger's seat and the driver's seat are flipped

 

Dates:

-Month Day, Year (e.g. January 30th, 2014) -> Day Month Year (e.g. 30 January 2014)

-Month/day/year (e.g. 1/30/14) -> day/month/year (e.g. 30/1/14)

 

School:

-Daycare -> Nursery/playgroup  
-Preschool/pre-k -> reception/infants reception  
-Kindergarten -> year 1/infants year 1  
-First grade -> year 2/infants year 2  
-Second grade -> year 3/first year junior  
-Third grade -> year 4/second year junior  
-Fourth grade -> year 5/third year junior  
-Fifth grade -> year 6/fourth year junior  
-Sixth grade -> year 7/first form  
-Seventh grade -> year 8/second form  
-Eighth grade -> year 9/third form  
-Ninth grade/freshman -> year 10/fourth form  
-Tenth grade/sophomore -> year 11/fifth form  
-Eleventh grade/junior -> year 12/lower sixth  
-Twelfth grade/senior -> year 13/upper sixth

(I don't know how common the alternative UK names for these are, but the year+number phrasing is what I've heard/seen the most)

-Junior high/middle school (years 6-8) isn't really a thing in the UK

-High school (usually goes from 9th to 12th grade)-> secondary school (goes from first form to

-Elementary school (usually goes from kindergarten to to fourth year junior) -> primary school (usually goes from reception/preschool to fourth year junior)


	7. American English to British English Dictionary

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An AE -> BE reference dictionary

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm absolutely certain that I've left some out. Comment if you think of any.

 

**American English**

| 

**British English**  
  
---|---  
  
airplane  
  
aluminum  
  
apartment  
  
apartment building

baby carriage  
  
bachelor party  
  
bachelorette party  
  
bangs  
  
barrette

bathrobe

bobbypin

candy

cell phone

chips/potato chips

closet

cookie/cracker

corn

cotton candy

cotton swab

counterclockwise

crosswalk

diaper

drugstore

eggplant

elevator

fanny pack

first floor

fish stick

french fries

garbage

garbage can

gasoline/gas

homey

jump rope

lollipop

mom/mommy

pacifier

panties

pants

parking lot

pharmacy

Popsicle

robe

shopping cart

sidewalk

soccer

stroller

suspenders

sweater

sneaker(s)

tic-tac-toe

turtleneck

T.V.

undershirt

underwear

vest

wax paper

windshield

zip code

zipper

| 

aeroplane  
  
aluminium  
  
flat  
  
block of flats

pram/pushchair  
  
hen night  
  
stag night  
  
fringe  
  
hair slide

dressing gown

Kirby grip/hair grip

sweet(s)

mobile phone

crisps

wardrobe

biscuit

maize

candyfloss

cotton bud

anticlockwise

zebra crossing

nappy

chemist's

aubergine

lift

bumbag

ground floor

fish finger

chips

rubbish

dustbin

petrol

homely

skipping rope

lolly

mum/mummy

dummy

knickers

trousers

carpark

chemist’s

ice lolly

dressing gown

trolley/shopping trolley

pavement

football

pram/pushchair

braces

jumper/sweater

trainer(s)

noughts and crosses

polo neck

telly

vest

pants

waistcoat

greaseproof paper

windscreen

postcode

zip  
  
  



	8. British English to American English Dictionary

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> BE -> AE reference dictionary

 

**British English**

| 

**American English**  
  
---|---  
  
aeroplane

aluminium

anticlockwise

aubergine

biscuit

block of flats

braces (clothing)

bumbag

candyfloss

carpark

chemist’s

chips

cotton bud

crisps

dressing gown

dummy (for a baby)

dustbin

fish finger

flat

football

fringe (hair)

greaseproof paper

ground floor

hair slide

hen night

homely

ice lolly

jumper

kirby grip/hair grip

knickers

lift

lolly

maize

mobile phone

mum/mummy

nappy

pants

pavement

petrol

polo neck

post code

pram

pushchair

rubbish

shopping trolley

skipping rope

stag night

sweets

telly

trainer(s)

trolley

trousers

vest

waistcoat

wardrobe

windscreen

zebra crossing

zip

| 

airplane

aluminum

counterclockwise

eggplant

cookie/cracker

apartment building

suspenders

fanny pack

cotton candy

parking lot

pharmacy/drugstore

french fries

cotton swab

potato chips/chips

bathrobe/robe

pacifier

trash can/garbage can

fishstick

apartment

soccer

bangs

wax paper

first floor

barrette

bachelorette party

homey

Popsicle

sweater

bobby pin

panties

elevator

lollipop

corn

cell phone

mom/mommy

diaper

underwear

sidewalk

gas/gasoline

turtleneck

zip code

stroller/baby carriage

stroller/baby carriage

garbage/trash

shopping cart

jump rope

bachelor party

candy/sweets

T.V.

sneaker(s)

shopping cart

pants

undershirt

vest

closet

windshield

crosswalk

zipper  
  
 

**Author's Note:**

> Sources:  
> "British and American Terms | Oxford Dictionaries." Oxford Dictionaries | English. Oxford Dictionaries
> 
> "British Vs. American English: School Terminology." British Vs. American English: School Terminology. 
> 
> "British vs American Vocabulary." British vs American Vocabulary | English Club
> 
> "Comparison of American and British English." Wikipedia. Wikimedia Foundation
> 
> "How to Write Dates in British and American English." English Lessons in Brighton. N.p., 27 Mar. 2014.


End file.
